OUR DAILY SURPRISE LINK
Heya, Voyeurwebbers! We have a fun Surprise Link for you today full of beautiful photos of everyone's favorite place. At least is should be everyone's favorite place ... Okie, if it is not your favorite place, then send in a contri of yourself or your significant other nekkid from wherever your favorite place is and we'll make world history, hehehe! Ready? Just Click Here
BAD HUMOR
A Love Story
I will seek and find you . . .
I shall take you to bed and have my way with you .
I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan.
I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop.
I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I'm finished with you.
And, when I am finished, you will be weak for days.
All my love,
The Flu
(Now, get your mind out of the gutter and go get your flu shot!)
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Women's Institute Produces Sex Video Guide
WEST SUSSEX, England -- Those of you who worry about losing your sex drive as you get older can now stop worrying. Getting older is no hindrance to enjoying the pleasures of sex.
In fact, the Washington Women's Institute in West Sussex, England, has produced a video guide to help its members improve their sex lives.
The video includes practical hints such as the best sexual position to adopt if your husband suffers from arthritis or has had a heart attack, and a guide to battery-operated "marital aids". The video, available online, is fronted by sex expert Janice Langley, 66, who belongs to Washington Women's Institute in West Sussex, according to news reports.
In one scene she holds up a French maid's outfit and suggests members may want to wear it to make their love lives "saucy". She also recommends enjoying sexual relations in the lounge, the kitchen or even the garden. The presentation is interspersed with cartoon characters enacting her words.
Mrs. Langley, who sits on the board of Britain's National Federation of Women's Institutes, was chosen for the job because she is a former nurse and a retired counselor and sex therapist.
"We're not all 85 and knitting," she said. "We have a diverse membership."
Reclining on a bed with a variety of magazines, DVDs and sexual aids, she tells female viewers: "They come in all shapes and sizes. You may say nice girls don't do that, but they do and they enjoy it."
Her presentation on "sex, myths and spicy tips" is one of six subjects included in the video, all fronted by Washington Institute members. The other subjects cover IT, gardening, home management, the environment and creativity.
-- You see, Voyeurwebbers! You see! I keep telling you you can never get too old to enjoy a healthy, active sex life and, thanks to Mrs. Langley and the Women's Institutes in England, there's more proof that I'm right. I love it when I'm right, hehehe! And for providing England's seniors with a video sex guide, I hereby name Mrs. Langley and the Women's Institutes in England as Voyeurweb's official "Heroines of the Moment", hehehe! You go, ladies! -- Igor
EYE ON: Weirdness by K.
As those who bother to read this column with any regularity know, Eye is more convinced than ever that the world is getting weirder and weirder. Well, to be fair, it isn't the world that's getting weirder, it's a surprisingly large number of the humans who inhabit the world that are getting weirder. As more proof that Eye's hypothesis is correct, we travel to merry olde London in merry olde England where the bookies are definitely weird.
The bookies, in their obscure wisdom, are facing a million pound plus payout if a psychic's prediction that massive UFO will appear in our skies proves to be true.
This weirdness began in Australia, where Blossom Goodchild, "channeler", said a huge intergalactic spaceship from the alien Federation Of Light will appear on Tuesday, October 14. Thus, by the time you read this, we will all know if London's bookies will lose over a million pounds sterling.Eye digresses, back to our story.
London bookies William Hill have taken a £1,000 ($2,000) bet from Lawrence Trout, of Wiltshire, which will win him £1million ($2 million) if Ms. Goodchild is correct. They have also taken bets from Ms. Goodchild's U.K. relatives. Her Surrey based niece Rebecca Simpson bet £100 ($200) and her step daughter Kelly Mosedale wagered £50 ($100), according to various news accounts.
Here's a tip, Voyeurwebbers, when betting, it's worth your while to pay attention the details of the wager. In this instance, the wording of the bet is that either U.S. President George Bush or British Prime Minister Gordon Brown will confirm the existence of intelligent alien life within the next year. Hills have cut the price from 1,000/1 to 100/1.
"We are slightly nervous but hopeful that Blossom is proved incorrect. We will be keeping our eyes on the skies over the next twenty four hours," William Hill spokesman Rupert Adams said this past Monday. "We have always been apprehensive of space based bets ever since we paid out the equivalent of millions when Neil Armstrong landed on the Moon in 1969."
Eye asks you, Voyeurwebbers, doesn't legitimate bookies taking wagers on the appearance of a large UFO seem just a bit weird. Not as weird, perhaps, as betting on it happening, but weird nonetheless. And the to win the bet, either Bush or Brown has to announce the presence of intelligent alien life stopping by for a little weekend shopping spree.
There is one, last little weird footnote to all this: UFO websites are burning up cyberspace with predictions that the vessel from the alien Federation Of Light will be visible in our skies for three days.
As Eye sees it, Voyeurwebbers, it would be best for all concerned if Ms. Goodchild is correct and the bookies have to pay off. Eye says this because it would offer us all a bit of relief -- apparently for at least three days -- from all the other crap going on the world. And we could all use a break from that. K.
Eye hastens to point out that any opinions expressed in this column are entirely his own and are neither those of Voyeurweb nor its management. K. |
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